Monday, 24 March 2014

Best Funny Quotes

Funny Naked Gun quote
Life is like a rainbow, with colors more than seven. At times you feel it's unfair as hell, at times, it's simply heaven... !!! One of the colors of life is humor. Like beauty, I believe that humor too, lies in the eyes of the beholder. While some people tend to focus on the seriousness of every aspect by stressing themselves out, there are others who try to identify the humor in the ups and downs of life. Among the latter category, are some authors who have beautifully written some of the funniest quotes and sayings that can help us let go of the stress and burden that we carry in our hearts most of the time. Even though, the burden will be released only for a few minutes, at least you will get a chance to smile your worries away. Have a look.

Best Funny Quotes About Life

The journey of life is truly magnificent with all that life has to offer!!! On one hand, if life brings troubles, anger, disappointments, and tears; it also gives you a chance to see the beauty of life by bringing happiness, success, friends, love, and laughter into your life. Consider reading these funny quotes to experience one of these moments and get ready to smile by reading some of the funniest quotes of all time.
  • All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. Jane Wagner
  • Love your enemies. It makes them so damned mad. P.D. East
  • It's always darkest before the dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it. Anonymous
  • Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. Charles Schulz
  • A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well-known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Fred Allen
  • You can't have everything....where would you put it? Anonymous
  • I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth. Janeane Garofalo
  • Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes. Jack Handey
  • If we're not supposed to eat animals, how come they're made out of meat? Tom Snyder
  • Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid doing entirely. Anonymous
  • Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. Homer Simpson
  • I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it...so I said "Implants?" Unknown
  • Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish? Author Unknown
  • Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poke me in the ribs and cackle, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals. Author Unknown
Best Funny Quotes From Movies

The reason why we all love movies...well most of us love movies is because we get to see a new story inspired by the story of life. It's impossible to witness each and everything, so humans made movies to take your emotions through the unseen and unbelievable scenarios. Movies have also given us a chance to smile at things which we never thought could have a humorous approach. Have a look at these funny movie quotes and laugh your way out.
  • Life is a fragile thing, Har. One minute you're chewin' on a burger, the next minute you're dead meat. Dumb and Dumber (1994)
  • Two thousand dollars for ice? I can get an Eskimo for two hundred dollars and make my own ice. Horse Feathers (1932)
  • Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with a seat missing, but it hurts. Naked Gun 2: The Smell of Fear (1991)
  • Bizu: [referring to Gluant] "And now he's pushing up the daisies."
    Inspector Jacques Clouseau: He is not 'pushing up the daisies,' he is DEAD!
    Bizu: [glares] It's an idiom!
    Inspector Jacques Clouseau: You, sir, are the idiom. The Pink Panther
  • Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Do not leave Europe!
    Yuri: But we have matches in Asia.
    Inspector Jacques Clouseau: All right. Do not leave Europe or Asia!
    Yuri: And we also have a match in Brazil.
    Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Do not leave Europe, Asia, or the Americas! The Pink Panther
  • The key here, I think, is to not think of death as an end. But, but, think of it more as a very effective way of cutting down on your expenses. Love and Death (1975)
  • You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a super-fly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly! Shrek (2001)
  • Scarecrow (Ray Bolger): 'I haven't got a brain... only straw.'
    Dorothy (Judy Garland): 'How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?'
    Scarecrow: 'I don't know... But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking... don't they?'
    Dorothy: 'Yes, I guess you're right.' Wizard of Oz
  • Was she in there before you baked it?' (Gomez refers to the girl popping out of the cake at a bachelor party) Addams Family Values
  • Sex is better than talk. Ask anybody in this bar. Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex. Hollywood Ending (2002)
  • Harry: One time, we successfully mated a bulldog with a Shih-Tzu.
    Mary: Really? That's weird.
    Harry: Yeah, we called it a bullshit. Dumb & Dumber (1994)
Funny Quotes About Love

By reading the following quotes about love, you would know that love is not always painful, if you look at the funny side of it! Have a look.
  • Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get, it's what you are expected to give - which is everything. Anon
  • An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. Agatha Christie
  • Love and electricity are one in the same, my dear. If you do not feel the jolt in your soul every time a kiss is shared, a whisper is spoken, a touch is felt, then you're not really in love at all. C.J. Franks
  • I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was, "You'll never find anyone like me again!" I'm thinking, "I should hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you." Anonymous
  • True love can blind you but at the same time if you let it, it can also open your eyes. Unknown
  • Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it. Unknown
  • Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there. Gracie Allen
  • You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty. Anonymous
  • Love is foolish ... but I still might try it sometime. Floyd
  • Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. Joey Adams
  • To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. Helen Rowland
I believe that laughter is the best medicine, and in our hectic and stressful life, if things are taken lightly and laughed upon, it becomes easier to deal with them, don't you think so? Humor and laughter can be found in any situation. All you need to do is, just keep your sense of humor alive. The aforementioned quotes would have made you realize how love can be funny, life can be funny, and how being 'funny' can help you laugh out at your troubles. After all, your life should make you feel good at all times, so laugh, smile, and be happy because life is so damn funny!!!